Worth the Risk (Book 3, Wolff Securities Series) Read online

  At her weakest moments she wanted to tell them the truth. That she was responsible for the death of their leader and she was glad the bastard was dead, but her training kicked in and she kept her mouth shut. They would only kill her faster if she told them. And she wasn’t ready to die.

  Not even in the darkest times when that was all she wanted to do in order to make the pain stop. They played mind games with her. Telling her no-one was coming to save her. That the Company had blacklisted her and even if she did make it out alive she would only go to prison for crimes against her own country. So why not tell them what they wanted to know and put an end to this?

  Sadly, they were right. She had been blacklisted. But not for crimes against her country. For disobedience. She didn’t regret her actions. Not when they resulted in the death of Ramil Diakameli. For that, she would never be sorry.

  What she did regret was that she had gone off the reservation and acted alone. Now no one, not even the Company, knew where she was or who had taken her. They probably assumed she’d gone to ground and run from any disciplinary action. With her connections she could hide for a very long time. Hell, maybe they thought she was dead. Would they even come looking for her after what she’d done?

  Shea squeezed her eyes closed. She’d fucked up this time. The end result had been a win for the U.S. but her methods had been off book and rogue. Not good in her line of work.

  The not knowing if anyone was looking for her reeked havoc on her mind. She had contingencies in place in case she ever went missing, but she had no way of knowing if those plans were executed. For all she knew no one was looking and she would die here, tied to a cold, metal slab in complete darkness.

  Alone and afraid.

  3

  Cedar Falls, Michigan

  Ellen Wolff slipped out the patio doors and made her way across the yard to the lovely L shaped dock her boys had put in for her over the summer. Her bare feet padded over the wet boards until she reached her favorite place: the Adirondack chairs perched on the L part of the dock. She lowered herself into one and stared out across the dark blue waters, a sense of calmness coming over her.

  She loved her family dearly but sometimes their good intentions suffocated her. They were all here, except Kell who was always off climbing his mountains, and they were hovering. She’d watched the news about the death of Ramil Diakameli and although it had come as a surprise, she was all right with it. The man was a terrorist. A very bad man who hurt her family. Part of her felt vindicated, the other part, the part that had been empty since the death of her youngest son, felt a bit less bare.

  Now, maybe they could start to rebuild. Heal. With the threat gone her girls could sleep again. She knew Avery was well on her way to healing, but Nate’s Macy had a long way to go. She acted as if everything that happened was in the past and she was fine, but Ellen saw the toll it took on her and her son. Like a shored up dam about to burst. And when it did…

  Ellen sighed softly. She would never stop her boys from doing what they were good at, but deep down she wished they would find normal jobs. Less dangerous jobs. Work that kept them close to home instead of taking them all over the world. She would never voice her true feelings, it would only put pressure on her boys and that would endanger their lives. So she kept it to herself and buried it deep so it didn’t consume her. After all, her boys were heroes. They saved people and made the world a better place. She would never take that away from them. Not for her own selfish reasons.

  But, God help her if she lost another child. A mother wasn’t meant to outlive her children. She didn’t think she could handle the loss of another.

  A hand landed gently on her shoulder. She looked up to see her eldest son, Quinn, standing there.

  “Hey, Mom,” he said.

  She placed her hand over his. “I just needed a minute.”

  “I get it.”

  And she knew he did. Of all of her sons, Quinn carried the most on his shoulders. Always taking responsibility for things, carrying the burdens so no one else had to. She knew he still blamed himself for Ryan’s death and that wouldn’t change until he forgave himself. Truly forgave himself.

  What was that they said? Time healed all wounds? In this case, she hoped that was true because this family had a lot of healing to do.

  “Have you heard from Kell yet?” she asked.

  “No, but I’ll keep trying.”

  She nodded. Kell was her most worrisome. Always had been. If there was a roof to be jumped off, or a dare to be had, he was smack dab in the middle of it. Never backing down and always taking the challenge. She couldn’t count all the times she’d taken him to the emergency room for broken bones and such. He’d always had a bit of a restless spirit and preferred his alone time. Not much of a talker, always in the background. A deep thinker, she called him.

  “He’ll show up eventually,” she said, believing it to be the truth. Kell always did.

  Quinn remained silent and she patted his hand. She knew he worried about his brother and hated it when he went ‘off grid’ as they called it.

  “I think I’ll take a chicken out of the freezer for dinner. Make some homemade noodles. A pie.”

  “That sounds great, Mom.”

  “It does, doesn’t it? I should get to work.”

  Quinn helped her out of the chair and tucked her hand in the crook of his arm as they walked back to the house. Home cooking was good for the soul and tonight they could all use a little boost.

  Besides, who could resist homemade peach pie?

  Sunnat Mountains, Azbakastan

  Kell rubbed his eyes with thumb and forefinger, trying to wipe away the grittiness. He’d stopped for gas and a quick snack, otherwise he kept driving. The coordinates Shea sent him were still a day’s drive away. He didn’t know what to expect when he got there, but he’d be prepared for anything. He’d taken a short detour and met up with a contact he’d made while with Delta for some weapons. He wasn’t loaded for bear, but he could hold his own.

  The engine whined as he began a climb up another hill. He was in the foothills of the Sunnat Mountains. His destination on the other side. In the tribal areas.

  The radio in the car didn’t work so he couldn’t listen to the news for updates on the riots he knew were happening after the death of Diakameli. Rumor had it Diakameli had ties to the presidency. Not good for anyone. The country would be in disrepair and until things settled down he needed to keep his head down and lay low. With luck, whatever Shea had gotten mixed up in had nothing to do with politics.

  If she was even alive.

  Kell reined in the thought. She was alive. Shea was a bulldog when it came to her job and life. It would take something big to take her down.

  After watching the video he had hundreds of questions that needed answers. Answers no one except Shea could give him. Like, how could she keep a pregnancy from him? Jesus. He still couldn’t wrap his head around that one.

  Him, a dad?

  Shea, a mom?

  If there were ever two people not meant to be parents it was them. Shea was consumed with her work at the CIA and his job took him all over the world. He wasn’t dad material.

  Kell shook off those thoughts. Didn’t matter now. Shea had lost the baby and there was no way in hell he’d make that mistake again. Once he found her and got his answers the past would be wiped clean and they could both move on.

  He needed to move on. Needed Shea to release the hold she had on him. She’d consumed his every thought for four years. Now, he would get the opportunity to lay the past to rest. The best thing for both of them.

  If he could find her.

  Jamshid, Azbakastan

  The door opened, letting in a sliver of light that stung her eyes. Shea turned her head against the assault, but only for a moment. She couldn’t risk a chance to see what was out there. They’d kept her in complete darkness longer this time. Messing with her head.

  Three people walked in before the door slammed shut and a dim lig
ht clicked on. She didn’t understand their use of a lantern except to show her they were in control. Of her. Of everything.

  She sized them up. One was considerably taller than the others. Dressed in an expensive dark suit instead of local wardrobe. He appeared to be in charge.

  He paced a circle around her, hands clasped behind his back. Something about him was familiar, she just couldn’t get her brain to function properly. Felt like it was full of cotton.

  The man stopped near her shoulder, his face covered by a black mask. Slowly, he reached up and pulled it off. Her stomach hit the floor. There was only one reason he would show his face.

  Her heart pounded in her chest. The timeline had moved up. Her time was running out. Fast.

  The mask came off and a pair of familiar eyes stared down at her.

  Stunned, she couldn’t speak. Couldn’t wrap her head around who she was looking at.

  A man she had trusted. Hell, he was the reason she’d made it through training. He’d been there for her in the worst of times, standing behind her, beside her, for her. He taught her everything she knew. And then some.

  The shock of seeing him here, now, hit her like a Mack truck. Maybe he was undercover. After all, he was one of the best spooks to ever make it through The Farm.

  Holding on to that little sliver of hope, she pleaded to him with her eyes, since her mouth was bound by a black cloth.

  Those fatherly green eyes creased at the corners as he spoke gently, as if coddling a toddler. “Shea, Shea, Shea. What have you done?”

  She strained against her restraints, but he put a hand on her arm to still her. “It pains me to see you like this.”

  She nodded, silently begging him to let her free.

  “You couldn’t just let things go, could you?” he said, his fingers wrapping around her wrist. “There are certain things in play that just can’t be messed with.”

  Her eyes went wide. No. No, no, no.

  “You always had the tenacity of a bulldog. Partly why we recruited you. And, smart. You could pick a penny out of a copper pile. The way you saw things that no one else did. Simply amazing. One of the best to come off The Farm in decades.”

  All hope fled, leaving her empty and limp.

  “If only you could have let this one go. Moved on.” His hand wrapped tighter around her wrist. “But not you. Never. You wouldn’t give up. Chased Diakameli down like a dog with a bone. Did you not realize he was part of a bigger plan?”

  Bigger plan? No. He was a terrorist who took many lives. Including her sister and one of the Wolff brothers. He raged war on innocents and deserved the bullet that took his life.

  “Well, no matter. You may have thrown a monkey wrench in the deal, but the damage was minimal. The end result will still be the same.”

  What was he talking about? Good God, was the Deputy Director for Operations in bed with terrorists? She’d never seen it coming. Never imagined this man who pushed her through The Farm, supported her, would turn traitor to his own country.

  No, she had to be hearing him wrong. Dan would never do that. He was the most loyal man she knew. A pillar in the CIA structure. Her mind must be messing with her again.

  “You should have listened to my warnings, Shea.” His fingers dug into her skin. “Then everything would be on track and you wouldn’t be lying here, close to death.”

  She struggled to release his hold, but her restraints prevented her. Frantic, she shook her head. Prayed this was an illusion, even when she knew it wasn’t.

  He did this to her. He was responsible for everything they had done to her in this room. One of her own.

  Betrayal burned through her. How could he turn his back on his country? His people? They were on the good side, fighting for the ones who couldn’t fight for themselves. How could he do this to her? They’d been so close. Walking the same path.

  Or so she thought.

  He leaned over her, his breath brushing her cheek. Very softly he said, “It hurts me to do this. You were one of the best, Shea. You will be missed.”

  Panic washed over her. She shook her head frantically, fighting her restraints as the man she trusted with her life straightened and nodded to the two other men. He stepped back, a look of pity on his face.

  “When we return in a few days to recover your body and stage it in your safe house, which, by the way, you deserve kudos for. It was a bitch to find.” He waved it off. “Anyhow, your maid will find you at peace in your bed, a knife in your hand and a suicide note letting everyone know you just couldn’t live with yourself after what you did. Being blacklisted for insubordination is the bottom of the barrel for a spook and you couldn’t handle your failure.” He chuckled. “Brilliant, right? Everything tied up in a nice little package. Goodbye, Shea.”

  The two men descended on her and her only hope of making it out of her alive walked quietly from the room. Closing the door on her freedom with barely a snick.

  4

  Cedar Falls, Michigan

  Macy Gibbs stared out the windows of Nate’s houseboat across the serene waters of Bleu Lake. She still wasn’t comfortable living on the water, but had to admit it relaxed her.

  She could see the Wolff houses through the trees. Most of them. Kell’s was buried the deepest in the forest. Should change the name of the lake to Wolff Lake since they owned it and no one else lived on it. She was beginning to appreciate the privacy. Especially when she woke up screaming in the night. Nate was always there, wrapping her in his strong arms, holding her until she fell asleep again. Sometimes not for hours.

  And now the source of those nightmares was dead. Ramil Diakameli couldn’t hurt her anymore. Not physically anyway. He still lived in her nightmares.

  The news had about knocked her off her feet. As it had the rest of the family, she was sure. It came out of nowhere and certainly wasn’t expected. In truth, she’d expected it to be one of the Wolff brothers who shot the final bullet. After what they suffered at Diakameli’s hand, they deserved the closure.

  Closure wasn’t what she felt. Numb was more like it. It seemed to be her only emotion lately. Except with Nate. With him she felt alive, hopeful, and protected. All he had to do was wrap her in his arms and her fears dissipated. She’d never met anyone like him and she thanked God everyday for him. She didn’t want to think about where she’d be if he hadn’t risked his life to rescue her.

  Moving in here with him seemed the most natural thing to do. She had no regrets when it came to Nate. Even if he did push her to talk to Avery’s therapist. She told him she didn’t need counseling. She was fine.

  But, she wasn’t. Deep down she knew it. Just couldn’t admit it to anyone yet. She’d always relied on herself for…everything. She didn’t know how to ask for help. But, if they stood any chance of making it once married then she needed to be healthy. Body, mind and soul.

  Nate moved into her line of vision, holding out a beer.

  “You read my mind,” she said, smiling up at him. God, he was the most handsome man she’d ever seen. How did she get so lucky?

  “Thought you could use one.” He dropped down into the chair next to her and stretching his tanned legs out in front of him. Barefoot, as usual. And she wasn’t surprised to see him wearing a pair of navy blue swim shorts and t-shirt. He loved the water. Sometimes she expected to see webbing between his toes.

  “You doing okay?” she asked. She knew the news of Diakameli had rocked him.

  Nate sipped his beer, staring across the water. “Yeah, I’m good.”

  And she knew he was. Nate didn’t mince words. Or lie. One more thing she loved about him.

  “Feels kind of surreal, doesn’t it?” she asked. “Who would have thought…” She let the sentence trail off, knowing they were thinking the same thing. That Ramil Diakameli had been such a strong presence in their lives, it was hard to believe he was gone.

  Nate reached over and twined his fingers with hers. “Things are going to get easier, Macy.”

  She tipped her hea
d back and met his gaze. “I know.” And she did because with Nate, anything was possible. Together they would conquer the world. She’d never felt as empowered as she did with him.

  “I’m here for whatever you need. You know that.”

  She nodded. “Yes.”

  They sat in silence for a moment. Macy broke the silence first. “I was thinking maybe I’d go talk to that friend of Avery’s.”

  There. It was out. She’d said it. Took the first step, as Avery called it.

  Nate played it cool, exactly what she needed him to do. If he said much she’d lose her nerve.

  “Good, that’s good,” he said, his thumb rubbing a sensuous circle on her palm.

  Macy set her beer on the table and rose to her feet. Still holding Nate’s hand she slid onto his lap and lay her head on his broad chest. His heart beat slow and steady beneath her ear.

  His arms wrapped around her. Just as she needed and she closed her eyes, feeling protected and safe. From here, she never wanted to leave.

  Sunnat Mountains, Azbakastan

  Kell pumped the brakes for a curve, the headlights bouncing off the rock wall looming in front of him. By midmorning he should reach his destination.

  His eyes felt dry and scratchy from staring at the road for so long and it was a struggle to keep them open, but he didn’t have time to stop. He needed to get to the coordinates Shea left for him. He had no idea what to expect when he got there, but he’d be ready for anything.

  Driving this area at night was dicey at best. There were little to no other cars on the road. He was good with that. Meant no one would harass him. Didn’t mean he wasn’t being followed or watched though. The mountain areas hid lots of dangerous things. Not just animals, but people. People who would want him dead just for being there. Some of the tribes were friendly, but most didn’t welcome westerners. Especially ones with a backseat full of weapons.